Cardi B has been struggling to make Offset smile following Takeoff’s death.

The rapper revealed that she and her husband have tried to carry on with their lives after the tragedy, but it’s been difficult to cope with the grief.

“We’re living our life normally, but deep down inside our hearts have been so heavy,” she said on Instagram Live.

Cardi admitted that they feel hesitant to express their feelings on social media. “I feel like if I talk about–the internet’s so desensitized–I feel like if we talk about how we really feel, what motherfu**ers really been going through, y’all would start saying, ‘Oh sympathy.’ And we don’t want no sympathy. We ain’t no charity case.”

Cardi went on to admit that she has tried to bring some happiness into Offset’s life, but it’s been hard. “But no lie, I have been feeling so hopeless trying to make my husband happy, trying to make him crack a smile, fu**in’ seeing him randomly cry, trying to distract his mind.”

It’s been a few weeks since Takeoff was fatally shot outside a Houston bowling alley. Cardi B says that people are starting to feel more “comfortable with trying to be funny” and talking “slick,” but she’s not having it.

“We not in the mood to be fu**in’ playing around with y’all,” she warned. “I will deadass kill y’all. Stop fu**in’ playin’.”

Offset has turned to his family for support during the heartbreaking time. Over the Thanksgiving holiday, he was seen playing basketball with his children. Following Takeoff’s memorial, he shared another emotional tribute to his cousin.

“Missing everything bout you specially that smile,” he captioned a photo of Takeoff.