Frank Ocean is speaking out for the first time since coming out. The Odd Future star explains why he decided to publicly address his sexuality.

Ocean penned a letter earlier this month in which he revealed that his first love was a man. “[It was] about my own sanity and my ability to feel like I’m living a life where … I’m happy when I wake up in the morning, and not with this freakin’ boulder on my chest,” he told the Guardian Guide for a story in Saturday’s edition.

He made a conscious decision to go public with it right before his album was released. “I knew that I was writing in a way that people would ask questions,” he said. “I knew that my star was rising, and I knew that if I waited I would always have somebody that I respected be able to encourage me to wait longer, to not say it till who knows when.”

The 24-year old “Pyramids” singer, whose album channel ORANGE debuted at No. 2 in the U.S., longed for a role model of his own. “I wished at 13 there was somebody I looked up to who would have said something like that, who would have been transparent in that way,” he said.

Although most of his peers have been supportive, Ocean is not worried about what may come from his revelation. “People are just afraid of things too much,” he said. “Sure, evil exists, extremism exists. Somebody could commit a hate crime and hurt me. But they could do the same just because I’m black. They could do the same just because I’m American.”